Arranology

Succeeding in the New American Oligarchy 1

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Of course survival isn’t the only goal, just the first one, and I guess we ought from time to time to be more positive and look at ways of making the New American Oligarchy work for you. It’s not impossible. In fact it’s relatively easy once you can wrap your head around what the New Rules mean. That meaning can be put very simply:

Money is all that matters.

You can leapfrog over all the usual corporate bullshit and forget about kissing ass to climb the ladder. None of that is necessary any more. That was for a time when the honchos had to be sure the people they hired were slick enough to hide how greedy and unprincipled they were. Fortunately hiding is passé. Now we show our roots and let hair grow in tendrils like ivy from our nostrils.

OK maybe we don’t but the point is that we’ve accepted immoral greed as socially desirable, even admirable as long as that greed works. IOW, as long as we bring in the bucks, all is forgiven no matter what heinous crime we have committed to get them. We are proud of our greed now. We brag about it. We hold it up as an example of they way everybody should be (especially those damn Frenchies). We trumpet it around the world, selling it like a can of cola. We don’t apologize. We proselytize.

Even better, because profit is the only criteria we’ve decided to count, the legality of any money-making idea you might come up with isn’t an issue, either. Much. Though there are a couple of minor restrictions.

  1. You can’t actually physically mug anyone. We’re still working on that and so far the rewards don’t seem like they’d match the risks anyway. After all, most of the cash is now in the hands of the rich so you’d have to mug them and that, of course, is off the table. Though the concept leads nicely into 2 & 3.
  2. You’d be well-advised not to promote any money-making scheme that targets the rich. Remember that of all the illegal and unethical scams perpetrated during both Bush Administrations (the mortgage scam alone skimmed more than a $Trillion$ and still counting), the only – only – thief who went to jail was Bernie Madoff, the one scammer who who targeted the rich rather than the middle or upper-middle income classes exclusively. Lesson learned. Tempting as it may be, lay off.
  3. Though illegal scams are generally welcomed by upper management and safe from any sort of “prosecution” however lame, there remains the possibility that an illegal scam could provoke unwanted public attention. Some citizens are beginning to realize the predatory nature of the New American Oligarchy and they could cause public relations problems if it dawns on them that what’s being done to them is wrong. As a rule of thumb, make sure that your scam’s worst possible return is 100 times the amount a severe backlash reaction or PR disaster would cost. The bean counters will then give the OK and your scam can proceed to make you millions.

None of these restrictions are all that odious and they shouldn’t prevent you from coming up with a nice rip-off scheme. From new ways to duck taxes to ways of claiming you own properties you don’t own, there are thousands of scams out there to choose from. Whether you institute an old but overlooked scam (shaving employee hours for example) or come up with something new and unique, many of the old obstacles are no longer in your way as long as you get a reputation for “bringing home the bacon”.

Have fun! And remember: If you’re not stealing, you’re not maximizing your potential profit.

Written by Mick

July 15, 2012 at 1:56 pm

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