Daily Archives: June 2, 2007

Isn’t That Just Like a Republican?

With the Emperor’s approval rating (28% and still dropping) now actually underneath what most pollsters used to think of as the irreducible Republican die-hard minimum – 30% – and the party itself on the verge of implosion/destruction/a plunge down the steep chasm of obscurity to a fiery death in the depths below, House Minority Leader John Boehner, that fount of wisdom, that cavalier of compassion, a man who – in the GOP anyway – passes as rational, reasonable, and altogether sane, has decided that Republicans need a “new brand” in the political marketplace.

To that end, he has gathered together the finest, sharpest minds in the party, men (there’s a rumor that a – *shudder* – woman snuck in somehow, but that filthy gossip is as yet unconfirmed) like Texas Congressman John “Who?” Carter who summed it all up beautifully.

“We’re trying to look into our conscience and define ourselves, and as we define ourselves, decide how we can best communicate that to the rest of the world,” said Rep. John Carter (Tex.), the Republican conference secretary and one of the effort’s participants. “In other words, what are Republicans?”

I’m sorry, I must have read that wrong. Did he just apply the word “conscience” to Republicans??!!

Oh, wait. I see. They’re met together to see if they can figure out if anybody in the GOP has one.

Or has seen one. Or knows where one might be. Or, if that’s too much for them, if they’ve maybe got somebody who can at least tell them what one looks like. From a distance, of course. It’s not like a Pub has ever seen one up close.

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