Daily Archives: March 27, 2004

Inside bin Laden

Tristero voluntarily takes on the dirty job of exploring Osama bin Laden’s mind and comes up with some startling and provocative thoughts. As scary as they are, they make a good deal of sense.

When someone is behaving exactly the way you want them to behave, do you anger them, or attack them? Of course not. So consider this:1. Vis a vis, the United States, Osama bin Laden had one primary goal: that America stop defiling the sacred soil of Saudi Arabia, home to Islam’s holiest places.

Well guess what? Bush withdrew from Saudi Arabia once Iraq was invaded and occupied. He did exactly what bin Laden wanted him to do.*

2. The most paranoid fantasy that bin Laden broadcast to the Arab world was that the United States would overrun and occupy an oil rich Arab country. Guess what? Bush has done exactly that.

3. Saddam’s explicit goal was to become the new Saladin, driving the Israelis into the sea, becoming the hero of all Arabia. Guess who thwarted that insane ambition permanently? As bin Laden must certainly see it, Bush has done bin Laden’s personal cause a tremendous favor: he eliminated one of The Sheik’s most serious and hated rivals.

Go read the rest.

Somebody Was Bound To Say It Sooner Or Later

Yessir, gang, Bush’s disgraceful performance of tasteless jokes at the Correspondents’ Dinner was, in fact, Clinton’s fault. Ace National Review Corner Kid JK Lopez has identified the culprit behind W’s embarrassing display and it was The Usual Suspect.

During the Clinton years, we already had the distinct impression Clinton took the presidency at times with all the seriousness of a spoiled, drunk college kid, and those dinners only encouraged him. Bush has restored dignity to the White House (come on, try to deny that) [OK. Lying about everything you do and starting an unnecessary war do NOT qualify as “dignified.” How was that?–m] and, yes, is leading a global war against terrorism. He has a natural, endearing humor (I do love it, I must say), that comes out near as often as he talks–when appropriate. [Or NOT so appropriate.–m]

So back to the playground we go: “Billy started it! It’s not Georgie’s fault!” I do love The Kids, I must say. They’re so…childish.

BushCo apologists are calling the “joke” of the missing WMD’s “self-deprecating.” I would agree with them if Bush had ever admitted that the whole war rationale was a cock-up and, like Clarke, apologized for it. But he hasn’t. That doesn’t make the joke “self-deprecating”, it makes it arrogant and a raised middle finger aimed right at the families of the WTC and Iraq war dead. “Ha ha, too bad. There weren’t any WMD’s and there ain’t a damn thing you can do about it!” Very funny. Ms Lopez thinks Junior’s humor is “natural” and “appealing”, not to mention “appropriate”. She must have split her sides laughing at Junior’s wizard 9/11 bon mot when told that hundreds of people had died in the Towers when a plane crashed into them: “That’s some bad pilot.” Ay-yukyukyuk.

Li’l Georgie’s sense of “humor” is a mite…twisted, to say the least.

(Thanks to World O’ Crap)

Frist Attacks Clarke’s Apology

Sen Bill Frist, Majority Leader and erstwhile doctor (some say “pretend doctor”, but I won’t go that far) who was nowhere near the inner councils of the Bush Admin in the lead-up to Iraq and only knows what he’s told by them about what went on, has decided that he is just the guy to explain to the country why Richard Clarke is a scum-sucking pig. In a long speech on the floor of the Senate, Frist is “outraged”. “I am troubled by these charges,” he says. Because they might be true? Well, no, not exactly.

I am equally troubled that someone would sell a book, trading on their former service as a government insider with access to our nation s most valuable intelligence, in order to profit from the suffering that this nation endured on September 11, 2001. I am troubled that Senators on the other side are so quick to accept such claims. I am troubled that Mr. Clarke has a hard time keeping his own story straight.I do not know Mr. Clarke….

Well, don’t let that stop you, Bill. Bushies don’t have to know anything to brag about how much they know, that’s been proved time and again. So don’t beat around the Bush. Tell us what you really think.

There is not a single public record of Mr. Clarke making any objection whatsoever in the period leading up to or following the 9-11 attacks. No threat to resign. No public protest. No plea to the President, the Congress, or the public, to heed the advice he now says was ignored. Mr. President, if Mr. Clarke held his tongue because he was loyal , then shame on him for putting politics above principle. But if he has manufactured these charges for profit and political gain, he is a shame to this government.I myself have fortunately not had the opportunity to work with such an individual who could write solicitous and self-defending emails to his supervisor, the National Security Advisor, and then by his own admission lie to the press out of a self conceived notion of loyalty only to reverse himself on all accounts for the sale of a book.

This obviously isn’t about truth, this is about saving Junior’s ass. Excuse me–Our Great Leader’s ass.

Frist then goes through the litany of personal attacks, historical revisions, lies and innuendo that every BA flack from Cheney on down has repeated, sometimes in identical words (prepared scripts courtesy of Rove/Bartlett Communications–“We Sink This Low So You Don’t Have To”), to every newspaper and tv station that would that would listen. By this point, you could repeat it as well as them, probably, and dissect it all better than I could, so I’m not going to go through it all again. Fuck ‘im.

See, they don’t need Frist to say it all again, that’s not why he does it. He does it because Clarke’s heartfelt apology was getting too much favorable press and somebody had to take it down. The repetition is just set-up to make the attack on the apology look like justifiable “outrage” on the part of an honorable man. Read it for yourself, and if you don’t throw up, my hat’s off to you.

In his appearance before the 9-11 Commission, Mr. Clarke’s theatrical apology on behalf of the nation was not his right, his privilege or his responsibility. In my view it was not an act of humility, but an act of supreme arrogance and manipulation. Mr Clarke can and will answer for his own conduct but that is all.

Uh-huh, that’s the way to treat the only person in the Bush Administration to admit a mistake that led to 3000 deaths, Bill–call it “theatrical”, arrogant and manipulative. That’s how radcon Publicans think.

Frist Attack 2–The GenesisI bet they handed this hot potato around the WH like there was some ticking coming from inside it.

“Condi! You wanna take this one? You’re playing point on Clarke.”

“Uh, no, no thanks. I gotta go christen Chevron’s new ‘Condi Rice–The Sequel’ tanker. Bye.”

“I could ask Dick–”

“Cheney? God, no, what’s wrong with you? Nobody believes anything he says any more.”

“So that would mean the president–”

“–is out. Definitely. Anyway, he’s in Utah signing up the Militias to be election officials in Florida. He won’t be available until after the cross-burning on Tuesday Try Powell.”

“Uh-uh, no good. Powell’s at the UN trying to explain why we threatened to invade Haiti if Aristide didn’t leave.”

“Shit… Did we do that?”

“Oh, yeah. Paid the generals who formed the opposition $3 Mil to run around shooting guns in the hills.”

“Bad timing then. How about Scooter?”

“Not a good idea. He’s up to his eyeballs with Justice over that Plame thing. Him and Hannah are both out–about to be indicted.”

“Christ, who’s left? Look, there’s Wolfie! Hey, Paul, over here! About Clarke–”

“Lemme at ‘im, that sonuvabitch! Just ’cause he thinks Laurie’s a fruitcake, he makes me look bad. I’ll get ‘im. On page 226 of Laurie’s book she proves–”

“No, no, it’s not about Iraq, Paul. We need to damage the credibility of the apology–”

“Oh, damn, I’m sorry. I forgot–I promised my wife I’d wax her knees and I’m late. Catch you next time, fellas.”

“I never seen him run like that before.”

“I did. Once. When they fired a missile at him in Baghdad.”

“We’re running out of sycophants, Chief–”

“‘Team Players’. I told you to call them ‘Team Players.'”

“Well, we’re running out of TP’s. Perle resigned and anyway his credibility’s in the toilet, Bartlett’s already been out there and got shot down, Rummy locked himself in the DoD john about halfway through Clarke’s testimony and won’t come out, and Doug Feith went to Bagdad with Chalabi–something about a coronation–”

“No. no, that’s in June. He bailed out, that’s what. Jesus, it’s like rats from a sinking ship.”

“You know, Boss, maybe we’re going about this all wrong.”

“What do you mean?”

“Maybe we should get out of the White House altogether. I mean, let’s face it, right about now everybody in the West Wing’s got about as much believability as WC Fields giving a Temperance lecture. Maybe we need new blood.”

“You might be onto something there. Feed the illusion that we aren’t the only ones who think we’re doing a great job with terror…. On terror…. Well, you know what I mean.”

“Yeah, but who? Who’s around on the outside who’s that gullible? that dishonest? that ambitious? that free of conscience? I thought we moved all those guys up here.”

“Not DeLay.”

“No, but we can’t use him. He shot himself in the foot when he used a children’s charity to front his fund-raising gig.”

“I know that, he was just an example.”

“Oh, I get it–you mean Congress. Boss, that’s brilliant!”

“Now you know why I’m in charge. But we got to find the right guy. We need a fresh face, somebody the public doesn’t know, somebody whose reputation we haven’t destroyed yet, somebody who looks good on the surface but underneath is a Grade-A, Number One, World Class asshole without a shred of dignity or a hint of integrity who’s so ambitious–

“And servile.”

“–and servile that he’ll do anything we tell him to do without questions or qualms.”

(A pause while they consider. Then light dawns on Marblehead. Simultaneously:) Frist!